You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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