It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
