Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You may now shotgun with the bride
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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