You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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