Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
