Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Randomize
