the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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