Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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