please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
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This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
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College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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