her vagine was all disorganized.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
