So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
