My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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