well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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