Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Randomize
