he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
