ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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