what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
