I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
She is in my trunk
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
