I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize