You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
