Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Drake has all the answers
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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