in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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