At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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