dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
