i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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