Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
you inspire me to be a worse person
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
