how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
