you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
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So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
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So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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