My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize