HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
