Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
