I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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