I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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