If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
