too bad you live with your parents still
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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