Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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