I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Randomize
