Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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