Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
