I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize