Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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