i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Well I just put wine in my tea
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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