Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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