Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I just threw up on my dentist
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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