Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
