how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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