so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.