Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.