I want to have your abortion
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
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Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up