listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus