we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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