But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
porn star boner night. come get it.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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