Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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